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Flock of Seagulls

I did it. I feel like shouting from the rooftops. When I got it done, I had this urge (which, fortunately for my dignity, I did not act upon) to raise both fists in the air in that sort of triumphant pumping motion one might see as a person finishes a marathon or wins a grand race. All this over having accomplished something that, to some, might seem ah... little:

I ran for 10 whole minutes today - two minutes at a time.

You'd have to know me, know my life, to know what an amazing achievement this is. I was once of the sullen angry smoking teenage species who muttered bitterly from under a fringe of dyed black bangs: "exercise is for losers." Seriously. I dreaded gym class. I would literally cry every year when I had (to attempt pitifully) to run for that damn presidential fitness crap, or whatever the hell it was called. I was a fitness misfit. It was part of my identity. I simultaneously ridiculed and envied those clean, ruddy faced, seemingly normal folks who could perform astonishing feats like completing a set of pull-ups, with grace and ease - enthusiasm even!

So... this is something. It really is. And it feels good. I feel all of those things I had an inclination I might - strong, centered, proud. I had been inching up to this small goal and was told by a mentor, "Just slow down and do the two minutes, you'll feel good about it." He was right. I do. And it underscores what I've come to love about the mentality of the runners I've encountered - speed is secondary to accomplishing your goal - just finish the thing, that in itself is winning. It's not about running like the wind, for this moment - it's about setting a goal for myself and not stopping until I've achieved it.

I mean, who would have thought that a mere 30 seconds of my life could be so painful, so rewarding.

But that's what I've learned about life, so it's not surprising. At the risk of sounding like a Nike commercial, I'll share my little secret with you all... the best way to prove to yourself that you can accomplish a thing is to just push onward (past apprehension and doubt) and do the thing.

It is, in fact, the only way.

M

Comments

z said…
It really is something! I agree with you---it's Zen-like, what you said about just doing it. The mind and body seem to simply and spontaneously align themselves to the bull's-eye even without conscious participation. The only precondition being you show up.

And I laughed when I realized just what the title for the post meant. I swear it made me break out into the song. "And I raaaaan, I ran so far awaaaay...." I sang it all the way to work:P
8:43 am
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