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the sky is grey. i'm sleepy. i have so much work to do that i get overwhelmed about it if i think about it too hard. so i'm just doing the next thing in front of me, and if i keep doing that, i will get done what i need to get done, and hopefully that is enough.

but first i think i need to take a nap. i haven't been sleeping well, and though last night i finally got something closer to a decent night's sleep (7.5 hours), all the lost sleep of this past week has caught up with me, and if i do not take the time to nourish myself, i will crash and burn. i know it. i'm getting better at taking care of myself. better than i've ever been. better at treating myself with patience and kindness and compassion.

i've felt so crazy and out of control lately, and now i finally am starting to feel centered again. i'm sorrowful, and i am walking through my days in the heavy presence of my loss, but i have reached a point of surrender. i'm not in control of this. i'm not in control of anything. and really, that feels fantastic.

cry. nap. get to work.

m

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